Issue 25: "Camp Hallelujah" by Joon Chung
Immigrant Hustle: A Monthly Mini Memoir
Hi KP!
I’ve been watching a lot of comedy specials lately. They usher in the lightness and feelings of togetherness that only laughter seems to welcome into our beings. Reading Joon’s memoir for the first time, I felt the endorphin, dopamine and oxytocin release of laughter, reminding me on a physical level that “laughter is the best medicine.”
Joon’s truthful, hilarious, and detailed accounts from his tween church camp journal felt both unique to Joon’s life and universal to our culture. If you grew up Komerican in the U.S., you KNOW how influential (and sometimes problematic!) the church can be! Get ready to laugh at the “only in Komerica” experiences Joon shares with us!
“Camp Hallelujah: God is good… all the time!” - A Mini Memoir
Joon Chung is a writer and comedian based in Brooklyn, New York. He performs standup comedy all over New York. After completing the Sesame Writer’s Room Fellowship, he’s gone onto writing for kids television series including: Lyla in the Loop, Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood, Bossy Bear, and Teletubbies. Joon hopes he’s brought joy to your kids’ lives. True story, he once put a mic on Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders. He was also a semi-finalist in the 2016 U.S. Air Guitar competition. Follow Joon on IG @thejooniverse or check out his site thejooniverse.com.
Hello, Reader. I grew up going to a lot of church retreats, and they played a pivotal role in my upbringing as a Korean-American. It was a time for friendship and fun, or “fellowship” as the church would call it. But there was also awkwardness and crushes–many crushes. So I wanted to share some journal entries I wrote when I went to “Camp Hallelujah,” a retreat center in Upstate New York. I was twelve, so there are a lot of FEELINGS. (Note: Names have been changed for privacy reasons.)
CAMP HALLELUJAH
“God is good…All the time!”
July 11, 2002 – 1:12PM
I’m soooo tired. Why does QT have to be at 7…30? It’s like no wonder it’s called quiet time. Everyone’s sleeping anyway. I could hear John snoring. Even Peter could barely keep his eyes open, and he’s a leader! I wish we could skip, but we found out if the full group doesn’t come, we get a penalty. And the group with the most points gets a prize. I wonder what it is.
At breakfast, we almost got to eat first. But Danny kept messing up the second part of the memory verse. Instead of saying, “Whoever comes to me will never go hungry,” he said, “...never go thirsty.” After the third time, they let us pass. I guess they can’t make us starve.
But guess what? In the line, Susie was in front of me. She was wearing ripped Hollister jeans–which I don’t get. Why do girls love wearing clothes with holes? Anyway. Her orange-red hair looked so perfectly straight. JK aka John Kim kept pushing me with his tray. He knows I like her, and he’s so freaking annoying about it. I ALMOST BUMPED HER! If I did, she’d spill her food, blame ME, and then hate me forever. Sigh… Is it a sin that I’m excited to go to worship service to hear her sing and not to praise God? But God made her, and she sings like an angel, so, really, it’s still praising God.
I mean, I should just ask her to pray for me. Then, we HAVE to hold hands.
“Hi, Susie? Can you pray with me? I have LOTS of prayer requests.”
“Wow, Joon, you’re so holy.”
“I try.”
Ha, imagine. Gotta go. Time for today’s seminar: Being Christ-like to Your Sisters.
July 11, 2002 – 9:40PM
Cup ramyun tastes so good at retreats. Sam showed me a trick he does in college – he makes a cup-cone-thingy with the lid, and you can put the noodles inside. Pretty cool.
During group activity, we had to figure out what to do at the final group presentation. You could do body worship, sing a song, or do a skit. All the guys wanted to do a skit–we picked Noah’s Ark. I asked if I could play Noah. I want to make it silly. But we only have 5 minutes to do the whole story! That’s not a lot of time, but we’ll figure something out.
Praise was good. In the middle of it, Susie stopped and started praying and crying. She’s so holy. Pastor Kim started praying for her. But then he started talking weird. It sounded like, “Habba jibutjishs yaweh…” Maybe he knows another language. I couldn’t really concentrate for the rest of the worship. I hope Susie’s okay.
The guest speaker was Pastor Henneike. He talked about how he used to be a bad kid and thought smoking was cool. Cigarettes smell so bad. Why would anyone want to do it? Like what’s the point even. But then he found Jesus and thought Jesus was cooler. And he was saying how Jesus was radical. BE A RADICAL. He was throwing tables, hanging out with prostitutes, challenging the priests back in the day. He even said Jesus was a badass. I gasped. I’ve never heard a pastor curse before.
At prayer time, we had to stay in our groups, so my plan to pray with Susie had to wait. But it was good. Mark said he struggled with lustful thoughts. We laughed, but then when Peter asked if anyone else struggled with it, we stopped laughing. I don’t know if I struggle, though. Struggling is such a strong word. I heard Mark looks at porn like every day. I’m like once a week. And definitely not on Sundays.
Gotta sleep. I wonder what breakfast is gonna be tomorrow.
My journal entries ended there. From what I remember of the talent show, Susie performed body worship to a techno version of a worship song, and pulled out glow sticks. Think of the final dance scene in Napoleon Dynamite but with six middle-school-aged girls and instead of Jamiroquai, it’s Jars of Clay. I didn’t get to pray for her. She’s probably a raver now. I crushed it as Noah. We did a bit about the ark leaving before a pair of unicorns could make it aboard. Good stuff for a 12-year-old. Thanks to the performance, we scored a lot of points and won the grand prize–our very own…Bible. Every 12-year-old’s favorite book. Praise be to Jesus.
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